On Valentine's Day, Should You Contact Your Ex Or Give Them A Gift Or Card?
Coach Lee - A podcast by Coach Lee
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Navigating Valentine's Day Post-Breakup: Insights from Coach Lee Valentine's Day can evoke a mix of emotions, especially for those who have recently gone through a breakup. Coach Lee, a seasoned relationship expert, addresses this sensitive topic, offering advice and insights to help navigate the complexities of Valentine's Day post-breakup. The Dilemma of Contacting Your Ex on Valentine's Day One of the most common dilemmas faced by individuals after a breakup is whether to contact their ex on Valentine's Day. Many consider sending gifts, flowers, or chocolates, hoping to rekindle the relationship or at least make their ex feel special. Coach Lee shares a story of a client who struggled with this exact issue, desiring to send a gift to his ex to ensure she didn't feel left out. Despite advice against it, the client proceeded, revealing a deeper motivation — the hope that such a gesture would make his ex want to reunite. The Reality of Gift-Giving Post-Breakup Coach Lee cautions against gift-giving as a means to win back an ex, labeling it as a form of bribery. The intent, although seemingly kind and thoughtful, often stems from a desire to influence the ex's feelings and decisions. Coach Lee emphasizes that if the basis for reconciliation is merely an impressive gift, it questions the sustainability of the renewed relationship. Attraction, both emotional and physical, is the cornerstone of a relationship, not the material gestures. The Consequences of Valentine's Day Gestures Sending gifts or even simple messages on Valentine's Day can have unintended consequences. Coach Lee explains that such actions can lead to pity or even annoyance, potentially setting back any progress made towards healing or possible reconciliation. The initial relief your ex might feel upon ending the relationship can turn into frustration, seeing your attempts as a refusal to accept the breakup. This can further diminish any remaining attraction, complicating the chances of getting back together. The Importance of No Contact Coach Lee advocates for the no contact rule, advising against breaking it for Valentine's Day or any significant occasion. This period of silence is not just about waiting; it's a crucial time for personal growth and reflection. Breaking no contact, especially with a gesture tied to Valentine's Day, might remove the mystery and confirm to your ex your unwillingness to move on. It reinforces their decision to leave, knowing you're still waiting in the wings, ready to reconcile at any hint of interest from them. Final Thoughts Navigating Valentine's Day post-breakup is challenging, but it's also an opportunity for self-reflection and growth. Coach Lee's advice is grounded in years of experience and observation. The focus should be on rebuilding oneself, understanding the dynamics of attraction, and, when the time is right, reapproaching the relationship with a stronger, more attractive version of yourself. Remember, the goal isn't to convince someone to come back with gifts or words, but to foster a connection that's based on mutual respect, attraction, and love. Valentine's Day should not be a time of manipulation or bribery; it should be a moment to focus on healing and moving forward, whether that path leads back to your ex or towards new beginnings. Coach Lee's insights offer a roadmap for navigating these emotional hurdles with dignity and purpose. Get Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit or Emergency Marriage Kit