A Self Directed Career Path

Guest  Vincent Pugliesi   Vincent is the founder of the Total Life Freedom Community. Living a life of freedom is of huge importance to Vincent and his wife Elizabeth. They homeschool their three boys, and believe that having control of your time, your money, and the work you do, leads to the ultimate life freedom. While teaching others to do the same, the movement of Total Life Freedom was born.   https://totallifefreedom.com Instagram @totallifefreedom1 Intro   Hey Everyone, welcome back to the Rogue Learner podcast. I have had a little break from publishing and I’m really grateful for you all having patience while I figure out my new rhythm here in the States. I don’t know if I’ve said it before on the show, but my husband is still in Europe and will be joining us later in the year so the time I once had to allocate to the show is reduced to very little, especially now that things are opening back up and my kids have access to so many places and clubs that were once closed due to Covid-19. I’d like to start by thanking you all for being so supportive and kind as I transition into our new normal. I am confident I can continue publishing great episodes, in fact I’ve spent the last week interviewing more amazing guests, but I do think the frequency of my publishing will slow at least until my husband joins us. For now, I’ll commit to one great interview a month, with the hope that I can do even more than that.    Some listeners have reached out to me to ask how they can support the show and I appreciate you wanting to help out. The show does cost money to produce, but I’d like to keep the information free to anyone who needs it. Still, if you like the show, get value from it, and have the means to support it monetarily, you can now do so by clicking the “Support Rogue Learner” link either in the show notes or from my profile on Instagram. I am eternally grateful for anyone who makes a contribution. The money will go directly back into paying for the domain, hosting, podcast distribution service and Adobe Audition subscription.    Another way to support the way if you provide a service to other homeschooling families is by advertising on the Rogue Learner website or adding a paid listing to the directory. You’ll find the link in the show notes or in my Instagram profiles. Thank you!    Also, as a thank you from me t o you I always have a book giveaway going on. If you leave a written review on Apple (which you can do through iTunes btw even if you don’t have an iPhone) and then send me a quick email with your screen name, you could win a copy of a book related to SDE. For every 5 reviews, I’ll be giving away two new books, “Raising Free People; Unschooling as Liberation and Healing Work” by Akilah Richards and “Why Are You Still Sending Your Kids to School?” by Blake Boles. Head on over to Apple Podcasts to leave an honest written review and get a chance to win one of these books!   I’m really excited to introduce today’s guest. Vincent Pugliese is an entrepreneur who began his career in a very self-directed manner. Feeling as though he had no options in his 20’s and no clear direction, he took up his father’s advice to take on a photography class. In his story, you’ll hear how he went from completely apathetic toward learning to deeply passionate about sports photography. What I find most incredible about him is that he is now using that knowledge he acquired regarding how people learn with his own three boys. I’m so thrilled that he took the time to chat with me and I think you’ll feel the same way I did by the end of our conversation: motivated and inspired! And now, here is my interview with Vincent Pugliese from Total Life Freedom.  Show Notes   Jenna begins by welcoming Vincent to the show and thanking him for talking about his homeschooling experiences on the ChooseFI podcast, because it really inspired her to think more critically about the option to do the same for her kids.    Vincent says they are currently moving from Pennsylvania to Florida and they're able to do that based on the flexibility of their jobs and homeschooling. He says the kids started out going to traditional schools, but he and his wife didn’t like that they didn’t get to spend much time with their kids. They believe in following kids interests and focusing on learning, problem solving and entrepreneurship vs. a curriculum.    Jenna asks what sort of business ventures his kids are into right now. Vincent says his oldest son has always loved bugs. One day when they were playing baseball, his son said he didn’t want to play anymore. While he was waiting on the sidelines, he caught a snake and everyone grew really interested in the snake and his son started teaching them about the snake. Vincent remembers at this moment that his son really stood out - he was unique. Everyone else was playing baseball and wearing the same uniform. It made him interesting because he was following his passion and interests.    His son ended up turning his love for bugs into a little business where he teaches people about his tarantula and lets them hold it  and collects tips. His middle son makes balloon animals for kids. They just got hired for a kids birthday party.    Vincent says his kids are learning how to be adults and doing adult things now. He doesn’t really understand why we make kids wait until they’re 22  years old before we let them start acting like “adults.”   Jenna jokingly says she’s in the wrong profession! Vincent follows up saying his kids are being paid $200 for doing a 2-hour birthday party. Someone told his son that he’ll be able to pay for college with all those earnings or not have to go to college at all!    Jenna adds that there’s so much being gained by the kids working on their business ventures, but the communication skills are definitely being sharpened. She remembers having difficulty in her youth talking with adults, mostly because of a lack of confidence. She thinks she missed out on really valuable learning opportunities by not engaging with adults.    Vincent says the boys are motivated on their own to earn more money and get more customers. Vincent stresses to his boys that it’s not about them, that it’s about bringing value to others. Each client should walk away feeling happy and fulfilled in some way, whether that be a child with a balloon animal or an adult overcoming their fear of tarantulas and holding one. Building a good business is all about adding value to other people’s lives.    Jenna asks Vincent to tell about his journey into each of his careers. Vincent’s journey was very self directed and did not follow a traditional path. Additionally, he did not feel successful in public school. Vincent is a business coach today, and he tells his mastermind classes that they have to be okay having no road map. Of course, at the beginning, there may be some critical steps that everyone will need to take but at some point you’ll need to become a problem solver,  innovator, and trailblazer.  Entrepreneurs are okay with failure. They learn from it. Vincent says he was always good at this in his youth.    His father suggested, one very late night, for him to try sports photography as a career. Vincent thought, “I’ve got nothing to lose” so he went ahead and began taking steps toward that career. Part of his training led him back to the classroom (college) and he was the best in his class. He was the best in his class - he wondered, how can I go from worst in class to best in class? He thinks it’s because he had a real passion for it - he could see himself doing that job and thriving in it.    Jenna says that it’s important to note that parents generally have some concern over whether or not  their child will ever choose a career path, but it does happen for everyone at some point. There will be something that comes into an unschoolers life at some point that motivates the young person to set goals and accomplish them. Don’t worry. They will figure it out.    Vincent says he has listeners of his podcast Total Life Freedom, that reach out to him at age 33 and did exactly what they were supposed to do, followed a traditional path, and are miserable in their job. They may have a beautiful house, car, kids, etc but they hate what they do and don’t know how to get out of it.    Vincent says unless his kids absolutely always love what they’re doing, he hopes they will evolve and change their careers. Through new endeavors, you learn new life skills, communication skills, and business skills. He and his wife’s “graduation criteria” revolves around financial goals because ultimately that’s what will give them the foundation to lean into a career that they’re passionate about. He doesn’t want them to be so far in debt with student loans and such that they find themselves stuck, as he so often sees with his clients. Financial wisdom and emotional intelligence will allow you to do anything in life.    Jenna adds that many kids in elementary and secondary school lack the time and possibly resources to dive deep into various interests and passions which robs them of self-discovery. By the time they’re of age to start thinking of their careers, they simply lack the experience and self awareness needed to decide on a path. Additionally, Jenna argues that living life provides you with real learning experiences that help you to better understand what it is you like doing and exposes children to so many types of ideas, subjects, passions, etc. Schools can’t offer that in the same way - it’s not flexible enough to accommodate each student in that way.    Vincent adds that compartmentalizing learning is not how the real world functions. His son, as an example, is really into tanks and building small versions of them and sells them. Through that one interest, he’s learned about WWII, engineering, and commerce.    Jenna asks Vincent to tell us what happened after he got started in his photography career. Vincent went on to cover the Super Bowl, World Series, NHL championships and was awarded International Sports Photographer of the Year by Pictures of the Year International in 2003. His work has been published in nearly every newspaper around the globe. He eventually moved to Indiana where he met his wife, Elizabeth and they both began working for a small newspaper there. Although he really loved his job and won many awards for his work, he didn’t enjoy having his schedule dictated by an employer. He wasn’t earning much money when his wife became pregnant with their first child so Vincent decided they needed to have their own business. His dad gave him some great advice once again. He told him that he had a skill that he wasn’t using. He was really good at photography and could be controlling his schedule and income but instead, he told Vincent he thought he was settling out for $15/hr and benefits.    He called his wife and told her they were going to start a wedding photography business. He says the first year was awful. Within three and a half years though, they had paid off all their debt, paid off their house and quit their jobs. That’s when their life of freedom started. What am I growing, what am I building next, and what am I a beginner in are three important criteria for Vinent in his life.    Jenna says there’s a ton of value gained from changing careers and passions throughout our lives and the skills learned from one path will ultimately be used in some way in the future goals and projects of the future. She herself has incorporated her photography business skills and writing skills into her podcasting venture and she continues to use her education background as a foundation for each of her endeavors as well. Jenna’s son loves gaming and through gaming he’s tried streaming on Twitch, creating a YouTube channel, and now coding. Learning isn’t linear, it’s more of a meandering stop and go joy ride.    Vincent says it’s not talked about enough, this concept of skill stacking. Even if things don’t work out, you can pull certain skill sets from one passion to another. Failure is experience. Too many people quit instead of using what they’ve learned.    Jenna asks Vincent what he thinks his kids would have missed if they had been in school. He says his kids would likely be missing out on being bullied at school. He gets asked, as we all do, about socialization and what he’s noticed is that kids who homeschool have no qualms hanging out with kids much older or younger than them. In public schools however, 13 year olds can seem like an idol to a 12 year old, whereas an 11 year old would look like an idiot. He remembers this being the mentality in his own school-aged years.  He doesn’t see that in homeschooling. He goes on to add that kids who have similar interests can interact in homeschooling, whereas in school and within a grade level, there may not be the opportunity for that.    School has also given Vincent’s family the freedom to travel. They have spent the last 10 years traveling south in the winter and exploring the Southern United States. People have often asked him “Where are the desks?” and “Where do your kids do school?” To that, he says school is everywhere. Life is school. “School” happens whenever you want to learn. When people are willig to see that, the whole world opens up.    Jenna asks Vincent what he would do if one of his boys wanted to go to school. He says they would absolutely support that, in fact they’ve presented it as an option to try out. Whatever they want to do, they support.    Jenna says she asks because her daughter recently asked to go back to school. Her daughter enjoys the structure and finds the curriculum motivating. She thinks there are definitely people for which school suits.    Vincent says he has ADHD and believes two of his three boys may have it too. He says he never thrived in school. He never liked structure created for him by someone else. Some kids do love direction and structure and thrive in public school though. There should be a choice for kids who don’t thrive there though. Some kids end up in detention and are told they’re bad kids so having the option to choose a different environment for kids to learn in is vital to them accomplishing their learning goals.    Jenna asks Vincent what the best thing about homeschooling has been for his family. He says for sure it’s the relationships; spending time together. Vincent and his family invented the “Beautiful Day Rule” which means that when the skies are blue in Pittsburg, they get their essential work done and then go do whatever they want that day. Recently, he and his son took the day off and stayed in a hotel for the night. They spent the day on paddle boats, at the arcade, swimming, and talking. His son said it was “the best day ever” over and over again. That is the greatest benefit of homeschooling; the relationships.   Helpful Resources Mentioned in Today’s Show   Total Life Freedom   Total Life Freedom podcast   Choose FI   Why Are You Still Sending Your Kids to School by Blake Boles   Raising Free People by Akilah Richards   Anything You Want by Derek Sivers   Your Music and People by Derek Sivers   Discord   Support Rogue Learner   Advertise on Rogue Learner   Leave a Review