Codependency and Dysfunctional Relationships Coaching [Relationship Series]

Hello, Welcome to Spiritual Awakening with Dr. Erin   Have you had a spiritual calling? Are you ready to breakthrough your limiting beliefs, transform your trauma, and birth your purpose? Are you ready to have a spiritual community? Get trained and certified as a spiritual leader?   www.NewThoughtGlobal.com   Social Media @drerin.tv    Become a Soulciété Member - Your Spiritual Community Get certified as a:  1. Spiritual Warrior 2. Spiritual Entrepreneur 3. Spiritual Coach 4. Spiritual Practitioner 5. New Thought Teacher, Speaker, and Minister 6. Doctor of Divinity   Binge My Podcast Series: 12 Money Breakthrough Series  52 Universal Law Series 12 E4 Trauma Method Series 12 Truth Triangle Coaching Series 6 Relationship Breakthrough Series 40 Spiritual Awakening 12 Metaphysical Bible Series Grab your FREE gifts and Universal Law Oracle Cards: https://www.spiritualawakeningcards.com/oracle-cards-order-now Transcription: (00:01): This is (00:02): Live from Los Angeles. Welcome to the Dr. Aaron show. We're all about manifestation transformation and breakthroughs. It's time to claim your birthright of prosperity, vitality and love. So grab your tea coffee, because together we're awakening the world. May you live your truth? (00:22): Welcome to the Dr. Aaron show. We come together each day to know the truth, live on spiritual principle and align with the universal law. We also come together to know the truth of who we are and claim our birthright of prosperity. So if you're somebody who has dealt with co-dependency dysfunctional relationships, or just really feeling inadequate or not totally fulfilled without somebody in your life, this is for you. I'm Dr. Aaron, I'm a doctor of divinity teaching universal law, metaphysics of mind, and how to reprogram your subconscious mind. I, um, am the founder of new thought global and society, and I have trained and developed, you know, thousands of women across the globe. And today I wanna break down how you truly can live and empower life, how you can heal from codependency dysfunctional relationships and what that process is. And if you're a coach, how to deal with somebody who's dealing with codependency. (01:18): So let's do this in you guys. Okay. So welcome again to this, um, this series R from you doing a series on codependency, dysfunctional relationships and all the above, because this is a big issue. You guys is a huge issue in our world, in our culture. And if you're somebody who's really seeking that freedom in your relationships, you're ready to really live a life where you are generating love and you don't have bounds to your love. And you're also able to accept people, places, and things as they are, and be able to fully step into your power. This is for you. So again, I'm Dr. Aaron and I know this very well because I was codependent for majority of my life. I came from an upbringing where I watched my mom as a total codependent in and out of relationships, ups and downs in her emotions. (02:06): And I too carried it into my, uh, young adulthood. And I ended up being in relationships where, um, I got married to somebody that I didn't even love because I thought that it would complete my life. Right. Um, I was with somebody that was an alcoholic and a drug addict, a very kind of famous a rockstar that was a complete disaster and dysfunctional relationship. And I'm not pointing the finger at him because I was just as dysfunctional, uh, because I didn't, I thought that if I, you know, if he just changed, then you know, I was only acting out or sending mean texts or screaming or yelling or doing whatever, because it was his problem and what he was doing and the lies and the cheating and all that stuff that he did. Therefore, I justified everything that I did. And then I came to a really screeching halt when I had to surrender and get down on my knees and pray to my higher self and say, I need help. (03:00): This is not working. And I cannot, I can no longer live like this. So believe me, I know a lot about codependency. And so today we're gonna break on down. How do you deal with this? Because when I train and develop spiritual entrepreneurs and coaches, we take 'em through a certification program. One of the big conversations is how do we deal with somebody that's dealing with addiction? Because codependency and dysfunctional relationships is an addiction because it's a looping process that happens, you know, within the mind. And as a meta physicians, we recognize that everything begins in mind and everything begins with our identity, with our limiting beliefs and are limited identity. And so for me, I know exactly where it came from. It came from the traumas of this lifetime and past lifetimes and the command and the identity I had was I'm not lovable and love has to hurt, love, has to abandon. (03:53): And so it was a self-fulfilling prophecy in my life for me to be able to pick people that were not available or me to make sure that it turned into some drama. For sure. Okay. So when I'm working with, um, developing a certifying coaches, it's really interesting because when we come to this topic, we have to recognize that, uh, you know, codependency and addiction stems from trauma. Trauma is not what people think it just is. It's not just a physical thing. If you're human, you've had emotional trauma, meaning that you've had times of high states of negative emotions that cause frequency and vibration, which, which informs a subconscious mind backed by what we call a command. And the command sometimes will go like this. I don't, I, you know, I'm not enough, something's wrong with me. I don't wanna live, you know, love hurts, love abandons. (04:43): I'm not lovable, whatever that command is and it plays out, right? So the issue is when we're dealing with a client that has codependency or dysfunctional relationship, the issue is that if they're still in that relationship, they're still in that environment and they're not able to not re-trigger those traumas. It's kind of like having a wound and you have a scab on it, right? And if you keep picking up the scab, it keeps bleeding. So if you have trauma and you are inner dysfunctional or codependent relationship, and you're constantly getting triggered, getting upset, re-opening those wounds. Then as a coach, it's almost impossible to have you really have true growth, which means that, yes, we recognize that trauma works on that and, you know, awareness and birthing your core values and healing. Everything has to happen, but we have to recognize sometimes we need to remove ourselves from the environment or from the relationship in order to heal. (05:40): So I remember, you know, years back being in a dysfunctional relationship and I loved him, you know, I, there, it was not a lie. I actually did love him, but there was also parts of it that did not work. And I was unable to be in the relationship, right. So it was a really hard thing. And they say it is stronger than heroin addiction in that when you love somebody and you have all those emotions, there's a high that people get off of the emotions of, you know, the high of falling in love. And let's say it's stronger than cocaine, right. And then, you know, coming out of it and being going through withdrawals and the whole cycle, the Merry go round cycle. Right. And we do wanna state that there's some incredible programs like coda.org or 12 step programs. And we highly recommend those for breaking the cycle. (06:25): We also recommend checking yourself into a facility. If you can't start to get help on your own, and you can't start to do it on your own. Okay. So beyond that as a spiritual coach, as somebody who trains and develops and certifies spiritual coach, there is a process to it in that as the individual coach getting trained certified each individual as a coach needs to decide if this is something that they want to handle, and they want to work with clients that are dealing with codependency or, you know, dysfunctional relationships. Me, I have come to my truth. And my truth is that I, um, will have an agreement. The first session I have with a client, or even before first session, we will talk about co-dependency and addiction. And in that, if, if somebody is dealing with that, then we have an agreement that they're either able to, you know, start to manage that and be able to not get too reactive or drink too much, or be in any abusive relationship. (07:22): Otherwise, our agreement is after 30 days working together or after a few sessions, that if they're not able to stabilize in their environment, then they need to remove themselves from the environment or we'll put our coaching on hold until they're able to. Okay. Because it's really important. And I wanna speak to the person that is going through codependency and going through dysfunction out there in the world right now. First of all, I just wanna say, I am holding you in my heart. I know the perfection of whatever you're going through. I really truly do. I don't. We, as, as divine teachers as understand the power of mine, I do not look at as bad or good in that it is for your growth. And I recognize that when I went through codependency and a very dysfunctional relationship, it was a huge blessing in disguise because it was the one thing that de that demanded me to do my inner healing and demanded me to get to my low so that I would surrender so that I would say, I, I decided to powerfully heal myself. (08:25): And so right now I'm holding you in my heart, knowing the perfection of wherever you're at. Okay. And I recognize that as you know, it's not about trying to get better. It's really surrendering to what is, and if you need to stay in that relationship, then you know what you need to stay there as long as you need to stay there until you are ready to say no more. And that's what I know for sure. And as a coach, I have one goal and one goal only is to help you get clear what your true goal is. And if you, you know, your goal is to be, be healthy, loving, completely, have an expressed, loving, functioning, amazing relationships in your life. But you're over here in dysfunction, discord, codependency, and suffering, and the insanity of it. Then we wanna know what is it that you truly want? (09:11): Are you committed to staying in that for a while and trying to figure it out? Are you committed to healing and completely getting over it? Only you can answer that. Okay. But in that, when you come to understand what you truly want, cuz some people are just committed to the misery. Some people really truly are committed to staying in the drama and saying there, my invitation is free to get real with yourself and ask yourself, what is it you truly are committed to. And in that you should get real with yourself. And if you're really ready to heal and do the work, my invitation is for you to get out of that environment. Okay. That I'm not telling anybody to get a divorce. I'm not telling anybody to break up with anybody. I'm not telling anybody anything I'm saying to get out of the environment so that you're able to have space so that your triggers from your trauma, aren't getting retried. (09:59): And then of course, so that's all about getting aware, waking up to how you are creating reality, no matter what they're doing, no matter if you're with a narcissist, no matter if they'v