Culture Corner | What do I call you?

In this episode of The A to Z English Podcast, Xochitl and Jack explain how you should address peers and authority figures in the United States.Transcript:00:00:01JackWelcome to the A to Z English podcast. My name is Jack and I'm here with my co-host social. And today we have a new kind of episode that we'd like to call the culture corner.00:00:12JackAnd social today's question comes from one of our listeners and our listener. This is Nash to asking. Nash is from Iraq and she says she asks, what did the majority of people in America prefer to be called?00:00:31JackSo when we talked about this episode earlier today, you you've separated it into two really interesting categories. I think peers and authority figures. Is that what you said?00:00:44XochitlYes, that's what I said.00:00:45JackOK, OK. So I like that because I think that that's a really good way to to like kind of picture the situation in America. And so how would you what? Well let's start with peers first, what do peers prefer to be called?00:01:02XochitlEars are usually referred to informally and you talk.00:01:05XochitlTo them by.00:01:06XochitlTheir name?00:01:07JackRight.00:01:08XochitlSo peers refers to also someone on your same level hierarchically. So if we're talking about, for example, your classmates in school, college, elementary school, whatever.00:01:22XochitlThose are your peers. If you're at a job, everyone who's in your same station as you, like anyone who is your colleague and isn't above.00:01:29XochitlView hierarchically, those are your peers in a family setting. Even your brothers and sisters are really your peers, and the parents are basically the 30 or any older adults are basically a 30.00:01:44JackRight. And now what about our case like I'm 47? You're 26. Or did you turn?00:01:48Jack27 I can't remember.00:01:50XochitlI turned 27.00:01:51JackYou turned 27 so OK, so I've got 20 years in you, but I still think.00:01:55JackOf you as like.00:01:55JackA peer, because we're both podcasters. We're partners in this in our business.00:02:01JackAnd so, even though there's a 20 year, 20 year gap, I I don't know about you, but if you started calling me, Mr. McBain, that would be really weird. You know what I mean?00:02:12XochitlSo awkward. And that brings you a really important point, which is.00:02:18XochitlSometimes if you start out formally, Jack was talking about, it's important to.00:02:24XochitlSo start formally because it's you're unlikely to offend someone, you might make it a little awkward, but if you start formally, you're unlikely to offend someone. They'll just correct you to speak to them more informally. And so if I started calling Jack, Mr. McBain now.00:02:43XochitlIf you insist, once a person has told you to draw up formalities, you can actually make the situation way more uncomfortable than you would have just following what they prefer and just being informal.00:02:58발표자Right.00:02:59JackI would say like a lot of people.00:03:01JackThat are you.00:03:02JackKnow. So let's let's go to like authority figures.00:03:05JackRight. So and it so.00:03:06JackIt doesn't matter the age, it's more about the like situation like.00:03:10JackSo social and.00:03:11JackI are. We're both podcasting partners in this business, so.00:03:15JackSo she and I.00:03:16JackUse our names. I call her social, she.00:03:18JackCalls me Jack.00:03:19JackWell, let's say let's you say you go to university.00:03:24JackYou you meet your.00:03:25JackProfessor for the first time, you know, at the beginning of the semester, like you said, you're always gonna start with the formal, right? You're gonna say Professor Smith?00:03:35XochitlJohn. Ohh yeah.00:03:38JackProfessor Johnson or Professor Smith or whatever. And then if the professor says no, no, don't call me Professor Johnson, call me Deborah or Deb.00:03:48JackMaybe then you have to switch to informal and call her Debbie from now on. Don't use the formal because she already asked you not to use the formal.00:04:00JackHow do we?00:04:01JackBut I would say if she doesn't.00:04:03JackSay that if she says, you know if you say good morning professor.00:04:08JackJohnson and she says good morning, Jack, or good morning social. Then I would always use Professor Johnson in that case because she never asked me.00:04:18JackTo use the.00:04:19JackInformal, so I'm going to assume she wants me to use the formal and then just continue that out.00:04:28XochitlIn authority, like in situations where you're addressing a person of authority, the default is only as a formality, so you only default to or assume talking to someone in a formal way. And then of course you can change.00:04:44XochitlIt later and.00:04:45XochitlIn most settings, people will tell you how they want to be addressed. In the US, we do tend to be like.00:04:51XochitlA little more direct in those ways and like for example, when I was in college, our professors would usually let.00:04:57XochitlUs know how.00:04:57XochitlThey wanted to be addressed, so if they want to be addressed as professor, so and so.00:05:01XochitlSo then that was fine, but if they wanted to be addressed by their first names, they would also let us know that as well. So it was never really a guessing game. Like what should I call this person or not?00:05:14JackMy friend's parents.00:05:16JackI would I always use the formal. I would say like yeah, my friend's name is uh is uh, you know Joe Johnson, I would say to his parents. Hello, Mrs. Johnson. Hello, Mr. Johnson. Like, that's what I would say. I wouldn't. I wouldn't just be like hey.00:05:34JackMitch. Hey, Barbara. You know like that because it's too. It's too comfortable. Like you don't know them. You're not close enough to them. But if they tell you, call me Barbara. Call me Mitch. Then you can you can do it so.00:05:51JackYeah, I don't know is it is.00:05:53JackIs this easy or is this?00:05:56XochitlI think it can be a little complicated and I think the most important thing to remember is that if it's your peers, you can be informal. If it's authority, you should be formal. Yeah, at least at 1st, and then if the authority figure wants to.00:06:12XochitlYou to talk more informally then. That's fine. And another important thing to remember is, UM, if you're unsure, I guess if the person is your peer or an authority figure, like if you're coworkers, but you don't know the person has a higher station than you, like maybe they're not quite the boss, but maybe they're a manager or something.00:06:34XochitlThen just start out.00:06:37XochitlWith talking to them formally, and they'll correct you if they want to.00:06:45JackI I love it, I.00:06:46JackMean, I think.00:06:46JackThese are really good.00:06:48JackRules right, peers. Informal authority figures start formally and then until they ask you to to to be informal.00:06:59JackAnd if you don't know?00:07:01JackDon't guess, just always go formal because it's better to be too formal than to be too informal. So I think those are the three rules. If you can follow those 3 rules, you'll be you'll be fine in in America.00:07:15JackIn the United States.00:07:16XochitlI do have a couple little things to add. 1 is it depends how casual or formal the setting is. Like if you're in a workplace or at school, these are formal settings, so again like you want to follow the rules we just established.00:07:33XochitlBut if it's a more casual setting, kind of like the podcast like Jack and I kind of met in a casual way and the podcast is more casual, like the age difference doesn't really matter in that context.00:07:47XochitlAnd then the last thing that I wanted to say is if you're talking to a random stranger like, say someone drops your wallet, Sir or ma'am is perfectly fine way to address someone.00:08:02XochitlUM, you're like, oh, excuse me, Sir, you dropped your wallet or excuse me, ma'am, you dropped your wallet. And if the person is a younger person or someone like in their 20s or or or maybe early 30s, you can say miss or.00:08:17XochitlLike a.00:08:19XochitlYoung man, for example.00:08:22XochitlAs well.00:08:24JackAnd and it. Yeah, I think that that's really good. And even if that's too much to remember, just certain, ma'am is is is OK.00:08:32XochitlYeah, that's OK if the.00:08:34JackEven even for younger people, you say?00:08:35JackSir, you know? Yeah.00:08:38XochitlYou'll call me ma'am and I find it, like, weird. Sometimes they've called me ma'am since I was a kid. Like people, people, even in American culture, we default to something.00:08:50XochitlSo it should be fine.00:08:51JackI've been called, Sir. When I was young too, you know? And it feels weird. You kind. It feels like you're it. It feels bigger than than me.00:08:59JackThan I am.00:09:00JackYou know what?00:09:00JackI mean like someones using a title.00:09:02JackThat's much larger than.00:09:03JackMy my status but but it's still effective. You know, if they don't know your name, they say Sir.00:09:14XochitlRight. So I hope that answer your answers your question. I'm getting tongue tied there listeners. If you have any other questions make sure to leave us a comment down below at A-Z englishpodcast.com shoot us an e-mail at AZ [email protected] and join our WhatsApp or WeChat groups to join the conversation.00:09:34XochitlAnd we'll see you guys next time.00:09:35XochitlOn another episode of Culture Chat, Bye bye.00:09:38발표자Go back.Podcast Website:https://atozenglishpodcast.com/culture-corner-what-do-i-call-you/Social Media:WeChat: atozenglishpodcastFacebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/671098974684413/Tik Tok:@atozenglish1Instagram:@atozenglish22Twitter:@atozenglish22A to Z Facebook Page:https://www.facebook.com/theatozenglishpodcastCheck out our You Tube Channel:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCds7JR-5dbarBfas4Ve4h8ADonate to the show: https://app.redcircle.com/shows/9472af5c-8580-45e1-b0dd-ff211db08a90/donationsRobin and Jack started a new You Tube channel called English Word Master. 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