The Hidden Power of Emotional Leadership: Why Going First Changes Everything

Today, friends, we’re talking about one of my favorite marriage coaching concepts: emotional leadership, and why going first in your marriage matters more than you might think. We all want deeper connection, warmth, and understanding in our relationships, but so often we find ourselves waiting… Waiting for our partner to initiate, to change, to get it. But what if the key to transforming your marriage isn’t waiting, but leading? We’re diving into the idea of emotional leadership: what it means to take the lead in creating the kind of marriage you want without feeling like you’re doing ALL the work.  We’ll explore how your emotional state influences your partner’s response, why small shifts in how you show up can create a ripple effect in your relationship, and how a cool thing called systems theory explains why changing even one part of a relationship changes the whole. I’m breaking down how showing up as the partner you want to be (before expecting your partner to do the same) can help you create shifts you never imagined. This isn’t about “doing more work” or carrying an unfair emotional load. It’s about going first and then growing together. It’s about taking ownership of your experience, leading with love, and watching what happens. Listen in to the episode for all this, PLUS: Four key ways to practice emotional leadership One of my favorite tools - emotional safety drills - and how to use it This episode is packed with insights you can apply immediately. If you’re tired of waiting for things to change and want a fresh perspective on how to create the marriage you desire, this one’s for you!   RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: Episode 96: Thought Work and The Self Coaching Model The Questions for Couples Journal The Marriage Mindset Makeover