Ep. 12 Unpacking Sexual Shame with Cheryl Fagan: Understanding the sexual shame feedback loop, where does sexual shame originate from and how we can achieve a healthy sexuality

This week the girls are joined by Cheryl Fagan who is a sexologist, sex educator and author of  ‘On Top: Your personal study guide to holistic sexuality.' The girls were interested in learning more about the origins of sexual shame, receiving mixed messages as a child and how to reduce shameful feelings around your sexuality. Cheryl discussed how trauma is stored within the body and therefore shame has psychological and physiological effects on humans. She explains what Vaginismus is and how it affects women when intimate. The girls dive into cultural myths around sex for men verses women and how society views sex as a performance verses a connection. They discuss how all genders hold shame in the same place although sometimes it manifests differently. Cheryl gives tips on how we can be kind to ourselves and our partners and how to break the silence around sexual shame. If you liked this episode and want to see more from Cheryl, be sure to follow her @cherylfagan on Instagram and check out her website at cherylfagan.org.   References:  The Gifts of Imperfections - Brené Brown The Body Keeps the Score - Dr. Bessel van der Kolk Sex, God, and the Conservative Church: Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy - Tina Schermer Sellers Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape - Peggy Orenstein Boys & Sex: Young Men on Hookups, Love, Porn, Consent, and Navigating the New Masculinity - Peggy Orenstein Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life - Emily Nagoski Slow Sex: the art and craft of the female orgasm - Nicole Daedone Love Worth Making: How to Have Ridiculously Great Sex in a Long‑Lasting Relationship - Stephen Snyder, M.D. GPPD - genital pelvic pain/penetration disorder / Vaginismus