A Renaissance of Our Own: The Stories We Tell Ourselves with Rachel Cargle

Can grief be an opportunity for growth and self-understanding? The answer, of course, is yes: but it’s a bit more complex than that. This week, author, philanthropist, activist Rachel Cargle on survival optimism, the resilience narrative, and why questioning the stories you tell yourself - with curiosity and kindness - is a powerful path of healing.    In this episode we cover:  How was grief modeled for you growing up, and how does that affect later grief? Can your memory of childhood grief be…. entirely wrong? (or at least, inaccurate) Can you do grief wrong?  The difference between curiosity and judgment Is it ok to feel relieved when a sick person dies?  Rachel’s new book, A Renaissance of Our Own   Want to talk with Megan directly? Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A sessions: your questions, answered. Related episodes: Gabor Mate on why we celebrate trauma, aka: resilience  Illustrator Aubrey Hirsch on the power of storytelling as an act of healing   Notable quotes:  “It's a practice of kindness to ourselves when we acknowledge and lean into the both/and… So when I feel shame about the relief I feel because I no longer have this sick mother to worry about, I can actually rest with that relief because I know that probably in about 2.5 days I'm going to be on the floor crying about the fact that she's not here. It’s both/and.” - Rachel Cargle   “(As) I really look at my childhood and have to dust some things off, (I’m) also cleaning off the spaces where good things are. You're not just going to the box of bones and figuring out all the hard, terrible things that happened in your childhood.” - Rachel Cargle About our guest: Rachel Cargle is a writer, entrepreneur and philanthropic innovator. Her new memoir, A Renaissance of Our Own, centers the reimagining of womanhood, solidarity and self. In 2018 she founded The Loveland Foundation, Inc., a non-profit offering free therapy to Black women and girls.  She’s also the founder of Elizabeth’s Bookshop & Writing Centre – a literacy space designed to amplify, celebrate and honor the work of writers who are often excluded from traditional cultural, social and academic canons.  For more on her many endeavors, visit rachelcargle.com.   About Megan:  Psychotherapist and bestselling author Megan Devine is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don’t call grief. She helms a consulting practice in Los Angeles and serves as an organizational consultant for the healthcare and human resources industries.  The best-selling book on grief in over a decade, Megan’s It’s Ok that You’re Not OK, is a global phenomenon that has been translated into more than 25 languages. Her celebrated animations and explainers have garnered over 75 million views and are used in training programs around the world.   Additional resources: Rachel’s book - A Renaissance of Our Own   The Loveland Foundation, Inc. - houses a collection of Rachel’s social ventures    The Great Unlearn, a self-paced, donation-based learning community   The Great Unlearn for Young Learners – an online learning space for young folks launching in 2022   Elizabeth’s Bookshop & Writing Centre - an innovative literacy space designed to amplify, celebrate and honor the work of writers who are often excluded from traditional cultural, social and academic canons.   Want to talk with Megan directly? Apply for one of her limited 1:1 consultations here   Or join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A sessions: your questions, answered.   Check out Megan’s best-selling books - It’s OK That You're Not OK and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed    Books and resources may contain affiliate links.   Get in touch: Thanks for listening to this week’s episode of It’s OK that You’re Not OK. Tune in, subscribe, leave a review, tag us on social with your thoughts, and share the show with everyone you know. Together, we can make things better, even when they can’t be made right.    Follow the show on TikTok @itsokpod and use the hashtag #ItsOkPod on all social platforms   For grief support & education, follow us at @refugeingrief on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and TikTok, and follow Megan on LinkedIn   For more information, including clinical training and consulting and to share your thoughts, visit us at megandevine.coSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.